Just a fact. It will blow over, it always does. After all, what good are emotions if they linger forever?
I mean, as of late I still haven't found that someone who would support me through everything, you know?
Can't really blame anyone, y'know. I don't get out as much as I should and I'm forever cursed to this friend zone. And I interpret signals terribly. Just once, I'd like for a girl to just be upfront. "Hey, Am, I like you". then they're free to add on whatever else they want, because it'll be recorded in my mental voicemail while I space out to somewhere far far away.
If I was just in a funk, that'd be cool. my little depressed region of my brain. instead, it starts to show everywhere. my drawings, my activities, blek.
But that's not the end. that's never the end. Those who end, die.
I mean, yeah. It blows to be alone. Every time you complete something grand in your life, every time you hit a low, you pull out your phone... and stare. Every whorentines day, you mourn the loss of your fish and curse that another annoying couple has decided to put up their stupid flowers next to your computer to add insult to injury. Or that you're having dinner alone on a friday night/ slicing apart stalkers and giving them names to make them sound like a gay couple when you prevent one from running away.
I mean, I've survived so far. It's just, if I could tweak a part of my life, that'd be what I tweaked. Even if it didn't change, I'd probably adapt somehow. I always do.
The thought of being with you is an endorphin. I've been told I think too much, but I think the world doesn't think enough. It would be easier to explain another day.
I won't classify this as a HATE rant, but i'm pretty sure it falls into the guidelines of a rant. I also need to get out and meet some friends. sitting at home is driving me up many walls.
It's just how I roll
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