3/12/11

So, if you haven't quite noticed, i've shut myself up for a pretty long time. Blog posts not been as full of that content you just love.

Since nothing really HAPPENS anymore, i'm now going to one-shot you my week. Stay tuned as I cover sexy tangos set to pop music, velvet suits, Jung Soo Yeon and the sex that never happened.

So, I spend a lot (i mean A LOT) of time at home. However, melor came back recently and we needed to catch a movie. Since i'd already caught immortals TWICE (and STILL don't get what its about) and that awesome movie about boxing robots was no longer showing, all i had left was twilight.

At the very least, I got my money's worth in laughs. This movie was so horribly done I would have cried. And then the censorship board had to go and butcher the movie FURTHER and now I walk out of the cinema not knowing at all what the fuck I just wasted valuable life seconds watching. Granted, given a choice, i'd watch this again over abduction (if you haven't read how much i hated THAT, I strongly recommend you do).

And the only thing making this movie worse is the people who obsess over it. I have my obsessions too, granted. But if someone's going around giving your shitpiece of a movie a beatdown, the last thing you wanna do is let him know how much it bothers you. Seriously. This is a new record for me. I got told to shut up during the movie by 2 GUYS (XY people) and then got called "uncivilized" for criticizing the movie.

I've hit an all-time high on that.

Although i'll give it one thing, to an extent the wedding was okay, and jacob is a LITTLE more tolerable here. But the werewolves are still having orgies in the woods and bella is still a... well she's not a slut, what do you call the most spineless and needy person on the planet?

i would mention you, but that'd be below the belt. even for me.

Moving on, the week also had its share of kpop. SNSD won an award and people hated that. The sky is blue, water is wet and every time you bite a piece of bread, it gets SMALLER. Honestly, the higher you get up the K-Pop ladder, the worse off it gets.

Basically, what i said earlier applies here. Both ways. Haters who hate only make the fans happier, and fans who bitch about haters only make the haters win. How do you curb this?

NOT. GIVE. A FUCK.

I mean, I'm happy everyone who won well, won. throw your own little parties and give the devil your soul or whatever the fuck you kids do nowadays when something goes your way. Done.

Now if you haven't noticed, i'm going to go on about goings on in the world instead of my head. Because this week, you don't get a glimpse. Still under reconstruction. Moving on.

So the awards show saw one more awesome thing thats never really happened in the world of kpop (my verification is that if its happened before and korea DIDN'T go into civil war, it'll happen a million more times (case in point, abracadabra))

(photo: AllKpop)

Before you think i'm all upset about this like the million of fangirls, boys and other, i'm actually pretty cool with this. We guys have no shot with hyunA anyways.

So, Trouble Maker, as I understand, is some form of mini group from B2STs HyunSeung and 4M's HyunA. Now, anyone who's seen BubblePop! would agree with me if I said the music video was largely a letdown. HyunA (in my opinion) is a very talented artist, capable of some pretty awesome dance moves (anyone who can tango is, in my books, a bauss) some sick raps and can pull off the fierce look well. Bubble Pop however, throws that all away in favor of her 2 talents right there. This performance however, was very tango-like, VERY steamy (more than twilight, anyway (I STILL feel profoundly ripped off)) and lets face it: HyunA looks better in a long dress compared to Bubblepop's "how many ways can we strip hyunA without getting this mv banned?" concept.

And then the mv came out.

i know i'm not mentioning HS much in this rant, because i'm not very familiar with B2ST (i like their songs, but never got acquainted with the members. bite me)

So the mv is like, good. Crazy good. it's like a korean Love. Sex. Magic. and anyone who knows how much i like that one... knows how much I like it? clearly i am in need of more sugar in my system.

if you've seen Hyuna's performances of Just Follow on Music Bank, you'll see the side of HyunA I don't get dates for liking. Fierce, charismatic, and still hot even though she's hardly showing any skin. While she's not rapping in this music video, that confidence is still there.

while the acting isn't GREAT, any scene involving the duo feels like a sexual timebomb waiting to explode. That bit where they almost lock lips and she pulls away almost leaves you breathless. It's not over-the-top, it's just hot.

And HyunSeung (the lucky bugger i wanna high-five SO BADLY right now) looks damn good in a suit. he looks a little babyfaced compared to HyunA, but does the man know how to work a suit. he has several in the mv, from leopard print to velvet. and they all. look. gorgeous. Sadly, i didn't take any caps of him (priorities. blow me, fangirls)

did i mention red lipstick is a killer turn-on? because yeah.

So with Melor being back, she's introduced me to british comedy. Brits are dry, sarcastic and awesome. While I love the kind of american humor associated with Barney Stinson (over the top slapstick) and Jack Donaghy (well-timed oddly placed phrases), there's just something I love about Stephen Fry and Jimmy Carr. Jimmy Carr tends to be a little offensive, but people say that about me all the time. Plus, anyone who can make a comeback like Jimmy deserves to be worshipped. If you haven't, check him out. Stephen Fry is at his best on QI, where he makes saying ANYTHING sound normal.

I've also finally gotten around to hearing LMFAO's Sexy and I know it. I will never watch the full music video, for I like my retinas not burnt to a crisp. It's not that I hate LMFAO, I quite liked Party Rock Anthem and SAIKI is pretty good too. it's just that I think they are prone to being seriously overplayed. And if there's anything i hate, its a good song being ruined by a 13 year old who just learned to cuss.

So if you haven't noticed, not much on SNSD. I mean, there was the award, and Star Life Theater (which i have yet to finish watching and therefore shan't comment). In fact, you'd almost say they did nothing in the uprising of HyunA for this week. A few minutes ago, I'd have agreed.

Then this happened.

Did I mention I loved this police concept? it's uniformed like Genie, they are showing off legs without looking too over-the-top and it just nags you at the back of the head with that little stripper fantasy with their knee-high boots.

"Yes Jessica, I have been bad. And the handcuffs are ABSOLUTELY necessary"

and I wonder why no one will date me.

BONUS: shoutout to Alex if she's actually read through this long and didn't storm off at the twilight rant.

It's just how I roll